Stop Staring at the Bird: A Manager’s Guide to Cultivating Talent

We have a tendency in technology to overcomplicate things. We build complex systems, then complex tools to manage them, and then complex titles for the people who oversee it all. The role of an “Engineering Manager” is a prime example. We’ve overloaded it with expectations: be a master architect, a product visionary, a project manager, a therapist, and an elite coder, all at once. This is a recipe for failure.

The result is a generation of burnt-out managers and frustrated engineers. Good people leave, not because the technical problems are too hard, but because the human system is broken. We’re losing talent because we’re focused on the wrong things.

We’re staring at the bird, when we should be looking at the ecosystem that allows it to thrive.

Stop Staring at the Bird

A researcher studying the endangered (Australian Cassowary) learned that to save the species, you don’t spend your time looking at the Cassowary itself. You study the environment: the water salinity, the amount of edible vegitation, the safety of their nesting grounds. You ask: Is there enough to eat? Is there a safe place to rest? Is this an environment where life can flourish?

This is the correct lens for engineering management. Your job is not to be the best engineer. Your job is to build an environment where great engineers can do their best work. This requires a fundamental shift in focus from individual output to the system itself.

This environment is built on a few core, human principles. They aren’t surprising, which makes it all the more surprising how often we ignore them.

People need:

• Belonging: To be part of a team where they feel seen and supported.
• Improvement: The chance to learn and grow.
• Choice: Autonomy and control over their domain.
• Equality: A sense of fairness in access and opportunity.
• Predictability: Clarity on goals and a stable sense of direction.
• Significance: To know their work matters.

When these needs are threatened, the brain’s fight-or-flight response kicks in. This isn’t metaphorical; it’s biological. An environment of uncertainty, unfairness, or stagnation is a threatening one. In this state, creative, high-level thinking is impossible. You cannot build the future when your team is just trying to survive.

What to Do: Be the Mortar, Not the Hero

Your role is to act as the mortar connecting the people and the structures. You hold things together, identify gaps, and provide stability so others can build. This means your focus should be on three things: the individuals, the team, and the organization.

For Individuals:

Get to know your people. This is the foundation. Ask questions and listen. Understand what drives them and what they feel threatened by. Don’t guess.

Invest in their growth. The ultimate goal of a career path shouldn’t be to become a manager. Provide a technical track that reaches the highest levels of the company. Sponsor your people. Use your influence to put them in positions to succeed. Be the person for them that you wish you had early in your career.

Give feedback constantly. Regular feedback provides predictability and helps people course-correct quickly. Praise nurtures a sense of significance and reinforces what works.

For Teams:

Build structure. Create clear, simple processes for how you collaborate, communicate, and make decisions. These are the building blocks that enable psychological safety—the belief that one won’t be punished for making a well-intentioned mistake.

Define success. Teams need to know what the goals are and see their progress. Connect their work to the larger company mission. It’s nearly impossible to over-communicate the “why.”

Treat failure as a learning opportunity. Blameless post-mortems are not just a tool; they are a cultural necessity. The way you discuss failure directly shapes whether your team feels safe or threatened.

For the Organization:

Manage up. Your manager is a critical node in the system. Keep them aligned. Ensure the concerns of your team are heard at the next level.

Advocate for better systems. Don’t just keep filling the same cracks with more mortar. If your hiring process is flawed, work to fix it. If there’s no clear career path, build one. Use your position to drive meaningful organizational change.

What Not to Do: Don’t be a hero. You are not the “shit umbrella.” Your job is not to shield your team from reality, but to give them the context and focus they need to navigate it. Over-protection creates a lack of agency. Don’t try to do everything. The unicorn manager who is a 10x coder, product genius, and people whisperer is a myth. Trying to be one leads to burnout and letting your team down.

Don’t mistake ambiguity for a lack of principles. While there are no simple answers in this work, there are fundamental principles. Fall back on creating clarity, safety, and purpose. The most important question you can ask yourself is not “What should an engineering manager do?” but “What kind of leader do I want to be?”

Focus on the people. Build the environment. The rest will follow.